Living with her controlling mom, a 20-year-old struggles with high cleaning expectations, especially when blamed for messes she didn’t create. Who was to blame? The mom’s boyfriend. Here’s what happened:
Her Mom Was Neat and Tidy
This 20-year-old woman lived with her mom, who was super neat and liked things to be very organized. Her mom made lists, charts, cleaned a lot, and made sure they always had enough food, which she appreciated.
Her Mom’s Extreme Cleaning
Her mom’s cleaning habits were quite intense, and she believed she had OCD. Whenever things were dirty, her mom got really upset and depressed. It got so bad that she would feel too sad and tired to do anything.
Her Cleaning Duties
Her mom always expressed this to her and her mom’s boyfriend. Because of her mom’s habits, she had a job to clean the bathroom every night. Her mom also had a rule that whoever made the kitchen dirty had to clean it, both during and after using it.
Their Difficult Past
Their relationship had always been tough. “Sometimes she can be overbearing, and she was abusive to me throughout my life due to not understanding my mental disorders, so our relationship is very strained at times. I’m always worried she thinks I’m worthless and she always thinks that I’m evil and I hate her,” she said.
Trouble with Her Mom’s Boyfriend
On the other hand, her mom’s boyfriend talked behind her back, saying she was lazy for staying at home while studying. He also didn’t help with the housework, even though he always criticized her.
The Late Night Cleaning Request
One night, her mom asked her to clean the kitchen, even though it was actually the boyfriend who made the mess. It was late, but she agreed to help her tired mom. She did all the tasks her mom told her to do.
Her Mom Blamed Her for the Mess She Didn’t Make
The next morning, her mom woke her up angrily, blaming her for the messy kitchen and calling her lazy and ungrateful. She was confused because she knew she had cleaned it. she said. She got angry because her mom blamed her without knowing the truth.
She Was Furious
When she came out, she noticed the whole place was a disaster. “Her boyfriend left food, spills, and all the dishes everywhere, and she said nothing to him. But I left a muffin pan and suddenly I’m ungrateful?” She wouldn’t have minded cleaning if her mother had asked instead of blaming her.
Did She Overeact?
When her mom came home, they argued about the mess. She tried to explain that the boyfriend made the mess, but her mom didn’t listen and got even angrier. Feeling unheard, she got really mad and told her mom she hated her. She also refused to make dinner and stayed in her room. She became very sad and confused about her mom’s actions.
One user commented, “Your mom sounds like a piece of work.”
Another responded, “My approach in these types of situations is as follows: if you blame me for a mess I did not make, I will make a much bigger mess and leave it for you to clean.”
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