He Didn’t Want to Be Identified as the Step-Dad to His Girlfriend’s Kids Despite Dating for Twelve Years – Is He Being Unreasonable?

A man recently wondered if he did the right thing after he told a stranger that his girlfriend’s kids were not his own. They had dated for years and she was unhappy about this. Here’s what the confused man said.

Dating and Family

Feeling Loved _ Appreciated
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He and his girlfriend Amy have been together for 12 years. He loved her so much and both of them had been through difficult times together.

His Girlfriend’s Kids

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Amy was 35 and had two kids, Anna (15) and Nick (18). They’ve been living together for almost nine years, and their biological dad wasn’t in the picture.

Being a Part of the Family

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Even though he had been around for most of the kids’ lives, they still saw him as their stepdad or their mom’s boyfriend. He’s not very interested in being their dad, and the kids were okay with that.

A Fun Day Out Together

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Anna’s into ice skating and one day, she had a practice for an upcoming event. So, he and Amy went to watch Anna’s ice skating practice. They cheered for her as she skated, while they sat with other parents.

Someone Asked Him About Anna

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Suddenly, another woman asked him if Anna was their kid, and he said, “No, she’s just my girlfriend’s kid.” The woman just said “Oh,” and dropped the topic.

His Girlfriend Was Upset

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Later, his girlfriend was very furious with him. She thought he should have said “yes” when asked about Anna. But he didn’t think he did anything wrong because Anna wasn’t really his child.

He Didn’t See a Problem

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Amy was unhappy, and he started to wonder if he made a mistake. “She’s not really my kid, so I don’t think I did anything wrong,” he said.

His Feelings Towards the Kids

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He actually cared about Anna and Nick, even though he didn’t want his own kids. He’s just not interested in being their dad.

Was He Right in His Decision?

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The kids called him by his name, and when they introduced him to their friends, they said he was their mom’s boyfriend, not their dad. Nobody wanted him to be their “dad,” and everyone was okay with that.

The Online Community Responded

Social Media
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One person said, “I think it’s unbelievably cruel for you to be with Amy for as long as you have been and make no effort to act like a father to these kids. If you’ve been dating for 12 years, that means the kids were 6 and 3 when you first got together.”

Another said, “Keep in mind that as a mom, she needs to look out for the best interest of her children. Why would being with a man who avidly rejects the notion of being their dad be something she’s okay with?”

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