A man recently asked for advice about a situation involving his wife and child. He had always wondered if their oldest child was really his, but was he wrong to get a paternity test? Here’s what he had to say:
The Man And His Wife Had Several Children
“I’m a 29-year-old white guy. My wife is 30 and black. We have two kids, a 3-year-old girl and a 5-year-old boy. My wife got pregnant with our son early in our relationship. We had only been together a year.”
The Early Pregnancy Didn’t Hurt Their Relationship
Although the pregnancy was stressful, the man and his wife wanted to use it as an opportunity to build a life together. They decided to get married. Everything seemed to be looking up for both of them.
The Man Began To Suspect That Something Wasn’t Right
“When my son was born, I accepted him as mine. However, I couldn’t help noticing how little he looked like me. He is noticeably darker than my wife. He doesn’t look half-white. My family and friends have asked if I’m sure he’s mine.”
The Man Was Sure That His Wife Was Faithful
Despite the suspicions raised by his friends and family, the man couldn’t believe that his wife would have betrayed him. Rationally, he knew that she was loyal. But he couldn’t silence the nagging thoughts in the back of his mind.
Their Second Child Was Born
The man and his wife were happy to welcome their second child into the world. The man was certain that the new baby was his, as his daughter was far paler than his son and shared his blue eyes. However, while his daughter’s birth reassured him as to her parentage, it only cast more doubt on his son’s.
The Man Tried To Treat His Kids Equally
Although he had his doubts, the man tried not to let them influence his relationship with his two children. He treated them as equally as possible, but it wasn’t always easy. In fact, he wondered if he was starting to resent his son. What if his wife had been unfaithful?
Enough Was Enough
The man realized that his suspicions were in danger of damaging his relationship. If he couldn’t trust his wife and couldn’t love his son, where did that leave him? He needed to know, one way or another, what had happened. It was time for a paternity test.
The Man Waited For The Test Results
The man waited for the results of the paternity test to come in. Whatever the result, he knew that it would profoundly change his relationship with his closest family. It was a nail-biting time, but eventually the results came in.
The Paternity Test Revealed The Truth
The man learned that his son was a genetic match for him. His wife had stayed faithful, and he’d been worrying over nothing. This reassurance helped the man to repair his relationships with his wife and son, and they even talked about having another kid together. There was just one problem.
The Man Told His Wife About The Test
The man couldn’t hide the fact that he’d conducted a paternity test. But when he revealed what he’d done, his wife was furious. She couldn’t believe that he’d doubted her loyalty. Even worse, she accused him of being racist towards their darker son.
Did The Man Make A Mistake?
The man had just wanted to put his racing thoughts to rest. He knew that finding out the truth was better than living in constant doubt, but his wife didn’t see things that way. As far as she was concerned, he should never have doubted her in the first place. But he thought that she was overreacting.
People Offered Their Opinions
One person lashed out at the man for his actions and defended the man’s wife: “She is absolutely not overreacting. You not only did not trust your wife, you let your ignorance get in the way of bonding with your child. I mean, what did you think was going to happen when you had biracial children?”
Another person took a similar stance. They said, “You let yourself fester for five years and (whether you realize it or not) likely hurt your wife and son in the process.”
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